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07 Aug 13:19

Interview with an Ebola Survivor

by Julian Morgans


Image via Nigerian Tribune

The Ebola virus is merciless. What starts as a sore throat and a headache quickly evolves into a catatonic fever, with victims hemorrhaging from the eyes and rectum before the organs ultimately break down. This is the situation currently fanning across Guinea, Liberia, Sierra Leone, and Nigeria, claiming some 932 people since March in the worst Ebola outbreak to date.

We wanted to interview someone who’s survived Ebola, an illness that generally kills 90 percent of sufferers. After reaching out to various NGOs, we spoke to Saa Sabas, a former medical worker from the southern Guinean city of Guéckédou. With the help of a French translator, he described how he contracted the virus at work, became dangerously ill, and then survived—only to face suspicion from his terrified community. Here’s what he said:

VICE: Hi, Saa, thanks for talking with us. Can you tell us about your background?
Saa Sabas:  OK, we are going to do it little by little. I was born in 1962, on the Ivory Coast in the little town of Bouaké. My father was an ex-serviceman in the French Army, where he worked as a war nurse. He was the one who taught me about medicine, so I worked at the pharmacy at the Guéckédou hospital. I worked there as an auxiliary nurse.

And this is where you got sick?
Yes, and as you know, it was contamination that led to my infection. I was looking after a patient who was also a retired nurse. I stayed with him for quite a long time. He was one of the first people to get sick, and I washed him, fed him, and held his hand.

So you contracted Ebola from him?
Yes. I started to get bouts of fever. Usually when I feel sick I just take an acetaminophen and get better, but this time the fever did not go away. I remembered what the doctors told me about the first signs [of Ebola], so I went directly to the hospital without even stopping at home. The doctors said I should be kept under observation for 21 days, and then they did some medical tests. The morning after, they told me I was infected with the Ebola virus, and they put me in medical care.

How were you feeling by that point?
I was having irregular bouts of fever, going from 38 to 39.6 centigrade [100 to 103 degrees Fahrenheit]. This fever lasted two days; then the third day I got a diarrhea. That lasted four days, until, on the seventh day, I got dysentery. Then finally I had hiccups for four days. I was very worried at that point.


Ebola patient receiving treatment. Image via Simusa.org

What was the worst part of all this?
The most difficult thing for me was the hiccuping stage. I remember also that my throat was so sore that I couldn’t eat. I’ve had fever before, and I’ve had diarrhea before. All of that, of course, made me weak. But the hiccuping stage really scared me. I’ve heard that lots of people die at this stage of the illness.

All in all, how long were you sick for?
Two days of irregular fever, four days of diarrhea, three days of dysentery, four days of hiccuping. That makes 13 days of illness. I was very well fed. I was very well treated. I was also kept under observation until I started to feel better.

So what happened when you got better?
When they let me go, they gave me clothes, and Doctors Without Borders gave me a lift back home. When I was getting out of the car, they took my hand to prove to other people that I wasn’t contagious anymore, in order to avoid stigmatization. Some people were scared, and holding my hand was a great symbol of my recovery. They also gave me a certificate that proved that I was fully recovered and that nobody should fear me. Then my friends started to cheer me and shake my hand. I thank God for that. Some people now call me “the survivor,” “anti-Ebola man,” or "the Revenant."

Could you tell a bit me more about the stigmatization of Ebola survivors?
My family was stigmatized when I was in hospital. Stigmatization comes from the fear of contamination, and when I realized that, I started to be socially self-confident again. I want to give you a concrete example: I now work raising awareness about Ebola alongside people from Germany, France, the United States, England, and so on. If any of them knew I’d been infected with the Ebola virus, they’d still be comfortable working with me. That’s why it’s important for me to go from village to village with the Red Cross, and fight against discrimination. I can use myself as an example. I say to people, “Look at me. Do you think these people from all over the world would work with me if I were contagious?” People often answer, “We get it, but it’s still frightening.” The discrimination against those who have been sick and have recovered is decreasing.

And what message do you want to spread with your work?
We tell people to break the chain of contamination. We say, if anyone feels any symptoms, go as fast as possible to the hospital, because you have more than 50 percent chance of survival if you go there in the first stage of the illness. And for you and your colleagues, you must not stop talking about us. You should encourage the medical scientists working on treatment for the Ebola virus.

Last question, Saa. How has Ebola changed your life?
Since I got a sick and survived, it has brought me a lot. I have become an awareness raiser. I go to see other men in communities, and I raise awareness about the Ebola virus. Now if anyone from anywhere in Guinea is looking for some information about Ebola, you have to ask Sabas your questions. Like you, people are coming to me. All that, of course, has changed my life. There is a saying: “Sometimes misfortune is good.”

Follow Julian Morgans on Twitter.

07 Aug 05:16

#446 When your plugged up nostril just suddenly opens up with no warning

by nkspas
IKEA Monkey

I have a head/chest cold right now so I am feeling this

Nose, what’s your deal?

We’ve been cursing you for the past hour for your snotty head-plugging ways. Breathing wasn’t happening and we were left mouth-gasping for air every few seconds to bypass your thick bulletproof wall of headglue. And you remember when we tried blowing our brains into some tissues to clear your salty facejam, right? All we got for our troubles was wet Kleenex bits stuck to our upper lip and a pair of eyes popping from the pressure.

So we gave up, we gave in, we gave it our best shot. We figured you won the war so we slumped our shoulders and walked away with our noses red like Rudolph and our jaws dropped like Big Moose.

But then after wrestling down our defenses you decided to suddenly just … open up without warning! Big winds rushed and gushed through our lungs and the weight of the world was lifted. We leaned back and sniffed in deep breaths, fresh air, and a whole new life.

We don’t know why, we don’t know how, and we don’t care. Nose, thanks for the random drips, thanks for the sweet relief, and thanks for the big giant breath of

AWESOME!

Sign up for a daily spam-free email from 1000 Awesome Things.

Photos from: here and here


06 Aug 13:45

Newswire: Busta Rhymes crashes Toyota’s awful “Swagger Wagon” commercial

by Christopher Curley
IKEA Monkey

Cringing so hard

Succumbing to the gravitational pull of giant bags of cash, rapper and 11-time Grammy nominee Busta Rhymes contributed a cameo to Toyota’s “Swagger Wagon,” a faux music video advertising the 2015 Toyota Sienna. This paean to awfulness stars The Neuberts, a fictional, down-to-earth family that loves to get together, dance, and rap about Toyota minivans (but don’t call it a minivan!). It’s every bit as horrible as it sounds, and is also somehow the sequel to a similarly themed, yet Busta-less counterpart from 2010.

A car company signing off on a clueless ad campaign is nothing new, but Toyota seems intent on plumbing the depths of unintentional cringe comedy with “Swagger Wagon.” This is not the face of a man having a good time.



“You pull up rims shinin’ / Trust me, I’m diggin’ your wagon,” Rhymes lies in his featured verse.

But perhaps there’s no ...

05 Aug 16:20

We All Know Pugs Need as Much Beauty Sleep as They Can Get!

IKEA Monkey

And now your moment of zen.

05 Aug 15:34

The Internet Had A Lot Of Fun With JBL’s $9.99 Sign

by Brandon Stroud
IKEA Monkey

Dickbutt

JBL 9.99 sign

YouTube


If you watched last night’s Monday Night Raw, you were inundated with shills for the WWE Network. The six-month commitment for the network’s first subscribers is coming up soon, and WWE’s so terrified of the number going down that they’re cramming in a “WWE NETWORK IS A GREAT DEAL AT $9.99″ before, during and after every sentence. It’s maddening.

The highlight was JBL writing “$9.99″ on a piece of paper and holding it up in front of Michael Cole’s face, in case any deaf people at home didn’t have their closed captioning turned on and had been watching the show in peace. BECAUSE THE INTERNET, Reddit has spent all night and most of the morning photoshopping Dickbutts onto it. The complete collection is here, but here are a few of my favorites. Maggle.











28s9gtv

Reddit



Filed under: Media, ProWrestling, Sports, Web Culture Tagged: JBL, MICHAEL COLE, PHOTOSHOP, REDDIT, SIGNS, WWE, WWE NETWORK, WWE RAW
04 Aug 21:15

Ready for Treatment: First Ebola-Stricken American Arrives in U.S.

IKEA Monkey

Oh great, patient zero has arrived

Dr. Kent Brantly — the first person infected with Ebola to be transported to the U.S. — was flown on a plane outfitted with containment equipment.






04 Aug 17:12

Rich Lady's Infamous Three-Story 'Female Man Cave' Closet Burglarized

by Tracie Egan Morrissey
IKEA Monkey

Ah, hubris

A Houston woman's three-story, 3000-square-foot closet—filled with designer clothes, shoes, handbags and jewels as well as a champagne bar—was so well publicized on national and local news that a burglar knew exactly what to steal in a recent million-dollar heist.

Read more...








04 Aug 17:11

NY Hotel Fines Brides And Grooms $500 For Each Negative Reviews Posted By Their Wedding Guests

by Ashlee Kieler
IKEA Monkey

da fuck

This is a generic hotel room. (frankieleon)

This is a generic hotel room. (frankieleon)

Between food, booze, flowers, decorations, and the millions of other tiny little things everyone has come to expect, weddings can be quite costly. One thing the bride and groom probably didn’t count on paying for: their guests’ negative online reviews of the hotel venue.

A Hudson, NY, inn now charges the bride and groom $500 for every negative review posted about the establishment on the internet, The New York Posts’ Page Six reports.

The boutique hotel’s website provides details about the fairly strict policy:

Please know that despite the fact that wedding couples love Hudson and our Inn, your friends and families may not. This is due to the fact that your guests may not understand what we offer…If your guests are looking for a Marriott type hotel they may not like it here.

Therefore: If you have booked the Inn for a wedding or other type of event anywhere in the region and given us a deposit of any kind for guests to stay at [The Hotel] there will be a $500 fine that will be deducted from your deposit for every negative review of [The Hotel] placed on any internet site by anyone in your party and/or attending your wedding or event.

The policy doesn’t just cover weddings that occur at the inn, either.

If you stay here to attend a wedding anywhere in the area and leave us a negative review on any internet site you agree to a $500 fine for each negative review.

The hotel notes that the fine will be refunded to the guest or the couple if the offending review is removed from the internet.

A post on the hotel’s Yelp page from November 2013 details the company’s attempts to have the former guest remove a negative review he made two months earlier.

The management of this hotel had the gall to email us twice to threaten us financially about the negative review!

Here is an excerpt from their first email:
“please note that your recent on-line review of our Inn will cost the wedding party that left us a deposit $500. This money be charged via the deposit they have left us unless/until it is removed. Any other or future reviews will also be charged to the wedding party (bride & groom) from the guarantee they have provided us.

Aside from charging for negative reviews, the hotel has other strict policies including canceling at your own risk.

The hotel states that it only accepts cancellations via email and will approve at its own discretion. However, the hotel can not make exceptions for any reason including “weather, family issues, personal issues, illness or anything that is not something we can control.”

Since the Page Six story appeared Monday morning the hotel has received considerable backlash from consumers on sites such as Facebook and Yelp.

Hotel fines $500 for every bad review posted online [New York Post Page Six]

03 Aug 23:39

Kinzie Chophouse Gives Beer the Wine Treatment

by Erika Kubick
IKEA Monkey

Hey! I know that guy.

Kinzie Chophouse Gives Beer the Wine Treatment Two beer nerds take wine to the top shelf at the River North Steakhouse. [ more › ]






03 Aug 14:26

Cry-Baby of the Week

by Jamie Lee Curtis Taete
IKEA Monkey

I was right about last week. This week, I dunno. Too close to call.

It's time, once again, to marvel at some idiots who don't know how to handle the world:

Cry-Baby #1: Julius Lopowitz

Photos via West Melbourne Police/Google Maps

The incident: A man was given a speeding ticket.

The appropriate response: Paying it. Or contesting it if you don't think you deserve it.

The actual response: He dialed 911 and reported a fake murder in progress in the hopes of distracting the issuing officer.

Earlier this week, a West Melbourne, Florida man named Julius Lopowitz was pulled over for speeding.

As the officer who pulled him over was writing his ticket, 911 dispatchers received a call to report a possible murder in progress.

"There is a murder that's going to happen, I swear," the caller said. "On Wingate and Hollywood. Definitely someone going to get shot. Please, please, Wingate and Hollywood. Please."

He then hung up the phone. 

As every available officer was being dispatched to the intersection of Wingate and Hollywood, the man called back. 

This time he said, "I swear, there's going to be a murder any second. There's a man and a gun. Please."

When he hung up this time, 911 dispatchers looked in their records for the caller's name. As he'd called 911 before, they had his name on record. The name was Julius Lopowitz.

The dispatcher said Julius' name over the police radio, and the officer who'd pulled Jules over recognized it as the name he was writing on a speeding ticket. 

“It almost worked,” Police Lt. Rich Cordeau told local news station WBTV. “The officer was trying to wrap up quickly to respond.”

Police believe that Julius made the fake calls when the officer's back was turned to write the ticket. 

Julius is now facing a felony charge that carries a five-year maximum prison term. Which is quite a bit worse than a $200 speeding ticket, so fuck knows what he'll pull to try and get out of that one. 

Cry-Baby #2: Kristina Riddell

Photos via Longmont Police Department/Google Maps

The incident: A concerned couple called 911 after seeing a child locked in a car on a hot day.

The appropriate response: Nothing. 

The actual response: The owner of the car ran the concerned couple over. 

On June 7th, 43-year-old Shannon Dominguez was with her boyfriend at a Dollar Tree in Longmont, Colorado.

While in the parking lot of the store, she noticed a young boy locked inside a hot car. "All four windows were rolled up and it was in the direct sun," Shannon told Fox 13.

She called 911 to report the situation. "It scares the heck out of me... Some innocent child might die," she said.

While she was on the phone, the child's mother, 27-year-old Kristina Riddell returned. Kristina was not too happy when she realized police had been called, and reportedly threatened to beat Shannon up. She then allegedly punched Shannon's boyfriend, Alan Mason, in the face. 

Kristina then got in her car reversed out of her parking spot, before driving at the couple. 

Alan rolled over the hood of the car, while Shannon went under the wheels, crushing her legs. 

Her tibia and fibula were both broken. She is currently bound to a wheelchair and has been told by doctor's that she may never walk normally again. "Every day is a chore," said Shannon. 

Kristina was arrested and charged with hit and run, child abuse and assault. Fox 13 reported that she already has an extensive criminal record, including assault, domestic violence, and driving violations.

Which of these folks is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll right here:

Who is the bigger cry-baby?

Previously: Some guys who tried to cut off a thief's hands vs. a guy who is suing some people he robbed

Winner: The suing robber!!!

Follow Jamie Lee Curtis Taete on Twitter

02 Aug 16:38

Top 10 Food Infographics to Hang in Your Kitchen or Save to Your Phone

by Melanie Pinola
IKEA Monkey

I like information

Top 10 Food Infographics to Hang in Your Kitchen or Save to Your Phone

Sometimes, a chart or infographic is the best way to communicate complex topics—like what the different types of cuts of beef are (and how to cook them) and how to fix common cooking mistakes . Here are some of the most save- or print-worthy food graphics we've shared on Lifehacker.

Read more...








01 Aug 20:30

German Cat Breeder Websites Are the Most Beautiful Thing on the Internet

by Ilona Blanco
IKEA Monkey

I love them all

Screenshot: vom Wilzenberg

The world wide web has given us things like instant messaging, tentacle porn, internet banking, cyber stalking, and cats—all of which have been written about a lot. Weirdly though, there's one thing that has been grossly overlooked: German cat breeder websites.

Most people think that it is companies like Apple who shape our understanding of design nowadays, yet there are thousands of dedicated housewives and other types of animal lovers out there tirelessly working to challenge our sense of aesthetics and redefine the notion of "beauty."

What follows is a symphony of forms and furs that can’t be matched.


Image via Fairy Cakes

FAIRY CAKES

What immediately strikes you here is the extraordinary composition of the image. A sleepy, somewhat sad looking fairy is emitting a ray of light that ends on a cat in a flower hat. The cat seems to be in a really good mood. She’s unpacking a present—but for who? Her contemplative gaze reaches out into the distance. She seems to be content, full of inner peace.

The cat with the pearl necklace also seems peaceful and well-balanced. 'Fairy Cakes' is a place full of foaming cupcakes and love.

Image via vom Jägerswald

VOM JAEGERSWALD

Spirits in the 'vom Jägerswald' [of the Hunter’s Wood] cattery are noticeably more inflamed. One cat all but accusingly looks directly into the camera, while the others' gazes are wildly scattered throughout the forest landscape.

A legless bust of a stag appears out of nowhere, somehow recalling images of Lars von Trier’s Antichrist. You almost don’t dare to take your eyes off this atmospheric backdrop. So many questions remain unanswered—I guess the only way to have them answered is a visit to the Birman cat breeder.

Image via von den Silberfeen

VON DEN SILBERFEEN

Glitter, fairies, clouds and pastel tones. The 'von den Silberfeen' [of the Silver Fairies] cattery abides by the unwritten laws of the cat breeder game and presents the fluffy offspring as what they are: babies that only deserve the best. The white cat on the left affects a somewhat psychotic look. But the same could be said of you when you open your eyes a little wider to look cute in selfies.

Image via von den Mooswiesen

VON DEN MOOSWIESEN

I'll be honest with you—this website is my absolute favorite and not just because of the minimalist design that eschews animation, moving text, and any presence of fairies. What I like the most about it is the super grouchy facial expression of this nasty puss that’s about to eat the tiny, absurdly spotted bunny in the left corner.

The only thing keeping me from setting the homepage of Mooswiesen [Mossy Meadows] as my desktop background is the fear of being locked up for being slightly cuckoo.

Image via Juraperlen

JURAPERLEN

Yoga for the eyes—everything on the screen symbolizes harmony. The abundance of crystal balls and delicate flower petals refers to the precious fragility of the British Shorthairs on sale.

These two kittens are as pure as the white roses surrounding them. They’re unbelievably plush and fucking happy about the pearl necklaces they’re wearing.

Image via from Gloryhill

FROM GLORYHILL

Whether you like these forever-shedding fur balls or not, there’s one thing you can’t deny about cats: Even when shit's running down their tails, they are able to maintain a certain sense of dignity.

'From Gloryhill' takes advantage of their grandeur, setting their British Longhairs in Greece—the birthplace of democracy. And pairs them with a very colorful bird.

Image via vom Halterner See

VOM HALTERNER SEE

While many cat breeders use delicate rosé and terra-cotta tones to communicate cuddliness, the 'vom Halterner See' [of the Halterner Lake] cattery works with the jovial hues of sun, sea and beach. You can almost hear the Caribbean music in the background, while the kitties in heart-shaped sunglasses stare directly into your soul, purring “Buy me!” An advertising concept so brilliant, I doubt Don Draper could have thought it up.

Image via vom Winde verweht

VOM WINDE VERWEHT

A lot of catteries employ slogans in an attempt to stand out from their competitors. Few do it with this kind of panache: 'Vom Winde verweht' [Gone with the Wind] orients itself with the 1930s Hollywood classic of the same name.

That’s why you feel emotionally involved immediately after noticing the little cat on the right pulling the drapes shut, to conceal the view of the plantation house. This deeply romantic motif is present throughout the website. The cursor, for instance, leaves behind a trail of sparks as you browse your way through a way of life that's now become extinct.

Image via vom Dellwiger Schloß

VOM DELWWIGER SLOSS

As other websites spend their efforts on making their animals look as innocent and lovable as possible, 'vom Dellwiger Schloß' [of the Dellwiger Palace] offers a much more realistic, unembellished look at what cats really are: fluffy egomaniacs that force you to surrender all of your love and couch space.

Image via of little Buddha

OF LITTLE BUDDHA

Cats are the Shaolin of the animal kingdom: fast, silent and… whatever, it somehow makes sense to bring up the obvious connection between cats and the monastic culture of the Far East. There’s a ton to discover on the homepage of the 'of little Buddha' cattery. Make sure you don’t miss the animated hummingbird!

Would I buy my cat here if I liked cats at all? Maybe.

01 Aug 00:48

Tell Us Your Bad Tattoo Horror Stories! And Show Us Pics!

by Lindy West
IKEA Monkey

Some amazing work in here

Tell Us Your Bad Tattoo Horror Stories! And Show Us Pics!

I think we can all agree that the funniest thing in the world is a blooper, which means that the real funniest thing in the world is a bad tattoo, because it is a PERMANENT BLOOPER. SOMETIMES ON YOUR FACE.

Read more...








31 Jul 22:56

Watch Janelle Monáe Channel Her Inner Sorority Girl in Her New Video

by Kate Dries

Never you mind that her album came out quite some time ago: Janelle Monáe has dropped the music video for her song "Electric Lady." It will probably make everyone stop what they're doing and immediately try to pledge Electro Phi Beta.

Read more...








30 Jul 21:37

Rep. Steve King: Immigrants Loading Up On Slut Pills On ‘Rape Path’ To ‘Death Train’, Sure Why Not

by Kaili Joy Gray
IKEA Monkey

Full on crazy

MadAboutAThing

leaving on a death train, don't know when i'll be back againIf it is a day of the week, which it usually is, then you can bet Rep. Steve King, the self-proclaimed Jesus of Iowa, is choke-holding logic and reason and common decency and kicking puppies and torturing chickens because he is Steve King. And Steve King is awful, terrible, awfully terrible, terribly awful, and just plain stupid. Whether he’s talking about scary Messicans or scary ladyparts or scary Obama or scary voices in Steve King’s head, he is always striving to scrape the scum-covered bottom of the wingnut barrel to show us just how Steve King he can be. So it will surprise you precisely zero amount that today, being a day of the week and all, Steve King is Steve Kinging on the issue of immigration in a way that only Steve King can:

This is a man-caused disaster, and the man that caused it is Barack Obama, with his DACA policies and his Morton memos, and the advertisement that has been such a huge magnet that have caused these families to give their daughters birth control pills and send them down a rape path all the way through Mexico, and it’s a death path on the death train.

Where to even begin? Besides dousing yourself in gasoline and lighting a match because this son of a bitch is a member of Congress who not only gets to go on the tee vee and say words that make the ears of any semi-self-respecting human being bleed, but he also gets to vote and make decisions that affect our lives, and the corndog-gobblers of Iowa keep sending him back to keep doing that (screw you, Iowa, seriously), so obviously, everything is meaningless.

But let’s try anyway to make sense of Steve’s latest tinfoiled word salad.

In the echo-y air tunnel that is Steve King’s head, the crisis of brown children invading America with their “calves the size of cantaloupes” to smuggle marijuana and god only knows what others kinds of brown people things into the U.S. of Assholes all leads back to that HUGE ad buy of Barack Obama’s, wherein he said “Y’all should come to America double quick (where I may or may not detain you and send your ass back to whatever non-America country you came from), and also I approved this message.”

And because all the non-Americans of the world watched the hell out of that ad, which was carefully hidden inside memos and policies that you might think do not actually say “Everyone’s welcome!” but that’s because you’re not as smart as Steve King, all those Messican families loaded up their daughters with birth control pills to send them down the rape path, which is like the yellow brick road, except with rape. And death. And a train somehow.

I could explain to Steve King that, as an aside, that’s not even how birth control works, though clearly he imagines those families saying, “Here, honey, it’s going to be a long journey on the rape path, so load up on these birth control pills now, it’s like a camel drinking water, that’s exactly how it works.” But Jesus Steve Christ am I tired of explaining how birth control actually works (even though I will no doubt do it again because I like pain, obviously), so let’s skip that for now and try to understand Steve’s creative geography, wherein there is a rape path that is also a death path, which you access by buying a ticket on the death train — choo choo! — to arrive at Steve’s office to tell him what an asshole he is, THANKS OBAMA!

Trying. Trying. Trying.

Nope, it is impossible. There is literally, physically, mathematically, psychologically NO WAY to suffer through the ear-bleeding to derive any sense whatsoever from all those words. No, Obama is not encouraging brown kids hopped up on slut pills to ride the death train on the rape path to death, that is fucking stupid and insane and really, we should have just stuck with the aforementioned self-immolation plan, which would still be less painful than trying to understand what even the fuck Steve King is talking about — an always pointless exercise no one should ever do because Steve King is Steve goddamned King and he will keep Steve Kinging on the House floor and the tee vee and the not-very-popular hate rallies until Iowans put us out of our misery and kick his sorry ass to the back of the unemployment line. Please get on that, Iowa. Like, NOW.

[Mediaite]

Follow Kaili Joy Gray on Twitter. Don’t forget to load up on birth control.

30 Jul 17:47

Clown Crashes Car in NJ, Clowns Come to the Rescue

IKEA Monkey

not the onion

A woman who had just finished performing at a clown show in New Jersey has some fellow clowns to thank after she crashed her car into a utility pole.
30 Jul 16:49

Economic Growth Surges 4% in Second Quarter

IKEA Monkey

Obama = worst president ever! Socialist LIEberal ruining this country!

U.S. economic growth accelerated at a 4 percent rate in the second quarter and the decline in output in the prior period was less steep.






30 Jul 14:36

Parents Stuck With $200K In Student Loan Debt After Daughter Dies

by Ashlee Kieler
IKEA Monkey

what a nightmare

The last thing families want to deal with after the death of a loved one is a phone call reminding them of their departed’s debt. But that’s the case for a number of parents who have inherited the obligation to repay the student loans they co-signed for their deceased child.

More and more families are finding themselves struggling financially with few options of relief after taking on their child’s student loan debt, CNN Money reports.

Unexpected Inheritance
That’s certainly the case for Steve and Darnelle whose daughter, Lisa, died five years ago. The couple quickly took in their three young grandchildren, but also received a rather unwelcome addition: $100,000 in student loan debt.

Years before her death, Steve had co-signed Lisa’s private student loans so she could attend nursing school and now, after her death, he was on the hook to repay the lenders.

The couple, who live on a modest salary and are now raising three children, struggled to make the loan payments each month. They depleted their savings and ruined their credit, Steve tells CNN, and eventually the loan debt ballooned to $200,000 because of late penalties and interest rates as high as 12%.

The situation would be markedly different if Lisa had taken out federal student loans. In that scenario, the couple could have had the loans discharged or received some kind of financial assistance.

Few Avenues To Receive Help
Instead the family is left grappling with their new reality and finding little in the way of help from the lenders.

Steve called each loan issuer to explain his situation, and while most expressed sympathy for his situation, none were required to actually do anything.

Private loan issuers have full discretion when it comes to doling out loan forgiveness, Deanne Loonin, an attorney at the National Consumer Law Center, tells CNN Money.

In fact, private lenders aren’t bound by the same federal requirements that federal student loans must adhere to, meaning private lenders don’t have to offer help to borrowers or co-signers unless they want to.

A few private loan lenders did offer Steve and Darnelle relief – albeit on a small scale.

Officials with Navient Corp., the recent offshoot of Sallie Mae, say they provided the family with a reduced balance and lower interest rates in the past. Additionally, Steve reported that after the lender was contacted by CNN, it lowered his interest rate to 0% on three out of four loans and reduced the amount owed by $8,000 to a total of $27,000.

Still, the company that handles the majority of the private loans now owed by Steve and Darnelle says it’s only in charge of collecting payments and can’t make the rules on forgiveness. Instead, the family would need to contact the original lender, National Collegiate Trust. And Steve did just that, only he says the company refused to provide any kind of help.

It Won’t Disappear In Bankruptcy
While many consumers facing hardships because of debts would simply file for bankruptcy, that’s not an option for Steve and Darnelle, and families in similar situations.

Unlike mortgages, credit cards and auto loans, neither federal nor private student loans can currently be discharged in bankruptcy.

“People with other debt from splurging — they can discharge that,” he tells CNN Money. “Student loans should really be the one type of debt they do discharge because it’s done to further an education and career. But somehow getting [my daughter] an education has encumbered me for the rest of my life.”

Loonin, with the NCLC, says that in rare cases parents can try to prove undue financial hardship in court to get debts discharged in bankruptcy. Otherwise, the only other option is to attempt to work out a payment plan with lenders.

Attempts To Reform Rules
Cases like Steve and Darnelle’s inspired Iowa senator Tom Harkin to introduce a bill in June that would, in part, allow private student loans to be discharged through bankruptcy proceedings.

Although the bill has little chance of being passed, it’s not the only legislative proposal made this year that would have given private student loan borrowers a bit of much-needed relief.

A bill, introduced by Massachusetts senator Elizabeeth Warren in May, would have allowed federal and private student loan borrowers to refinance to rates set for first-time borrowers – approximately 3.86%. That measure died on the Senate floor when it didn’t garner enough votes of support.

Taking The Issue To The Masses
With relatively few options left, and his dreams of retirement disappearing, Steve and Darnelle turned to Change.org to petition the president to allow student loans to be eligible for discharge in bankruptcy. So far, the petition has 1,064 signatures.

This isn’t the first time grieving families have turned to the online petition site when seeking recourse for the private student loans they’ve inherited.

CNN Money reports there have been four other attempts by families, one of which was successful. In that case the brother of a deceased borrower petitioned the bank to stop seeking payments from his grieving father and the loan was eventually forgiven.

Another petition, created by Virginia mother, Angela, asked private loan provider First Marblehead Corp. to forgive her son’s $40,000 in student loans after he was murdered in 2008. While that petition received more than 150,000 signatures, no action was taken by the lender.

Just Another Problem With Co-Signed Loans
The situations faced by these families further illustrates the problems associated with the practice of co-signing private student loans.

In many cases, lenders require a co-signer in order to issue these loans and to minimize the interest rates. In 2011, nearly 90% of all private student loans included a co-signer; someone who, in the event that a borrower can’t repay their debt, is obligated to do so.

The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reported this spring that automatic-defaults associated with private student loans were at an all-time high.

Borrowers have increasingly found themselves put in automatic-default at no fault of their own. The issue occurs when a loan issuer finds out the loan’s co-signer has died or filed for bankruptcy.

Although the two co-signer situations are admittedly different, they are a alike in the fact that little recourse is available for borrowers.

“Private student loans should really be a last resort, if possible,” the CFPB’s Rohit Chopra, told Consumerist earlier this year. “When you run into trouble you often have very few options to navigate tough times.”

Grieving parents hit with $200,000 in student loans [CNN Money]

30 Jul 14:33

Is Wedding-Drunk America Ready for Rented Bridal Gowns?

by Kelly Faircloth
IKEA Monkey

My aunt rented her gown 20 years ago. This is not a new thing.

Is Wedding-Drunk America Ready for Rented Bridal Gowns?

Women once married in their finest—then wore the dress as their Sunday best for several years afterward. But styles have changed so drastically in the last 20 years that most brides won't even wear their mom's wedding gown. Plus, they cost a fortune. Consequently, it appears America may be ready to embrace the rented dress. Praise Juno!

Read more...








30 Jul 01:13

Shake Shack To Open A Second Chicago Shop

by Chuck Sudo
Shake Shack To Open A Second Chicago Shop While fans of Shake Shack await the opening of the hamburger chain’s first Chicago store later this year, a second location was announced Tuesday near Millennium Park. [ more › ]






29 Jul 17:22

Come For The Ninja Turtles, Stay For The 9/11

by The Superficial

Paramount recently released a new promotional poster for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles‘ upcoming release in Australia which featured the Turtles jumping out of an exploding skyscraper because their lives are dope and they do dope shit. Which seems pretty innocuous for a summer movie poster until you notice the release date of SEPTEMBER 11. A day when actual people jumped out of an exploding skyscraper to their deaths. So after hearing from the Internet, Paramount pulled the poster off Twitter and Facebook which always puts these fires right out. As for how an oversight like this could happen, I’m pretty sure it wasn’t an oversight as much a source for Michael Bay‘s erection. “Aw yeah, 9/11, baby, fuckin’ shit blowed up so hard.” *fap fap fap*

THE SUPERFICIAL | AboutFacebookTwitter

29 Jul 16:52

Brett Ratner's Hercules Is Bullshit and I Will Never Forgive Him

by Lindy West
IKEA Monkey

Why do all the men have full armor over their chest and stomachs but the one woman has to have her belly showing? COME ON.

Brett Ratner's Hercules Is Bullshit and I Will Never Forgive Him

As much as I love him, Hercules is kind of a middling hero. He's not the strongest (that's Atlas), or the most cerebral (Odysseus, imo), or the #1 boner-inducer (Achilles, duh). He's just kind of...a guy. The big thing that makes Hercules great is his labors—the fact that he is just constantly going on quests and punching an awesome monster. The monsters are kind of his deal.

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29 Jul 16:33

Concealed Carry Permit Holder Fires Shot At Robber, Forcing Cop To Take Cover

by Chuck Sudo
IKEA Monkey

Dumbass

Concealed Carry Permit Holder Fires Shot At Robber, Forcing Cop To Take Cover Keep it in your holsters. [ more › ]






29 Jul 13:04

Newswire: Drunk History and Nathan For You renewed for third seasons

by William Hughes
IKEA Monkey

We watched 1 episode of Nathan For You and it was so awkward and uncomfortable I don't think I can watch another one. Just so much cringing to the point of it being unwatchable.

To the delight of fans of inventively awkward comedy (and the sorrow of at least one mom), Comedy Central announced that it will be renewing Nathan Fielder’s bizarro business advice program Nathan For You, along with the Funny Or Die-produced Drunk History, for a third season. As reported by Entertainment Weekly, the two shows join Broad City, Kroll Show, Inside Amy Schumer, Trip Tank, and an extended fourth season of Key And Peele in being renewed by the network for the coming year.

There’s no word yet on which of our culture’s taboos Fielder will gently manipulate business owners into violating, but we’re sure that whatever he sets his targets on, he’ll do it with a peaceful, slightly needy smile, and a mischievous glint in his eye. Unless that’s just another picture of that old naked dude touching himself.

29 Jul 02:27

Reckless Toddler Drives Jeep Into Wall and Acts Like NOTHING Happened

by Madeleine Davies
IKEA Monkey

Its just that kid's face in the picture making me lol

Reckless Toddler Drives Jeep Into Wall and Acts Like NOTHING Happened

In Myrtle Creek, Oregon, a 3-year-old boy and PUBLIC NUISANCE recently endangered the lives of his neighbors when he accidentally knocked the Jeep he was playing in out of park and drove it into the side of a house. The child's reaction after this DEPRAVED act of violence and recklessness? To go home and watch cartoons, NOT A CARE IN THE WORLD.

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28 Jul 14:50

Cry-Baby of the Week

by Jamie Lee Curtis Taete
IKEA Monkey

That first one is some straight-up Sharia shit. Uhh, not cool, crazies. Second guy is just a garden-variety whiner.

It's time, once again, to marvel at some idiots who don't know how to handle the world:

Cry-Baby #1: Merv Mitchell and an unnamed imam

Images via Google Maps and Philadelphia Police Department

The incident: A man allegedly stole some money from a mosque.

The appropriate response: Calling the police. 

The actual response: Two people tried to cut off the accused thief's hands. 

Earlier this month, an unnamed 46-year-old man arrived at the Al-Masjid Ur-Razzaq Ul-Karim mosque in Overbrook, Pennsylvania for the morning prayer service. 

According to police, as the man was leaving the building, he was approached by Merv Mitchell, the mosque's emir, and the mosque's imam, who also has not been named. 

Merv and the imam are said to have confronted the alleged thief, accusing him of stealing jars of money from the mosque. CBS Philadelphia reports that the two men then dragged him down a set of steps into the building's back yard. 

Once in the back yard the men allegedly pinned the victim down and held his arm against a log.

"One of the offenders grabbed a machete from inside the mosque and struck the victim near his wrist," Lt. John Walker, of Southwest Detectives told Philly.com. "The blade cut through some of his tendons."

They stopped the attack before cutting all the way through the man's wrist. He was treated at a nearby hospital and released the same day. 

Merv was arrested and charged with aggravated assault, simple assault and "related offenses." According to Philly.com, Merv has an extensive criminal history, with previous convictions including robbery, theft, burglary (which all kinda seem like the same thing?) and carrying a firearm without a license. 

The mosque's imam is yet to be arrested. 

Cry-Baby #2: Nigel Sykes

Pizza image via Wikimedia Commons

The incident: A man got beaten up while attempting to rob a pizzeria at gunpoint.

The appropriate response: Nothing. That's an expected outcome when robbing people at gunpoint.

The actual response: He's suing the people he tried to rob.

Nigel Sykes is currently in prison serving a 15 year term for his involvement in a series of armed robberies.

One of those robberies took place in a Newport, Delaware pizzeria called Seasons Pizza back in 2010.

After entering the pizzeria through the back door, Nigel flashed a revolver to a delivery driver, who gave him $140. He then went further into the restaurant, where he was restrained by two employees. As he struggled with the employees, he fired his gun. The bullet didn't hit anyone.

"That is when the assault began," wrote Nigel in his suit. "All of the Season's Pizza employees participated in punching, kicking and pouring hot soup over my body. I was unarmed and defenseless and had to suffer a brutal beating by all of the employees of Seasons Pizza." 

Nigel then claims that he blacked out and, when he regained consciousness, was being tazed by two officers from Newport Police Department. He also claims that officers used a racial slur against him, slammed his head into the hood of a police car, and denied him medical treatment for 8 hours. Which actually sounds like a legitimate complaint that should be looked into. 

Nigel is asking for $20,000 from six separate Seasons Pizza employees, $20,000 from each of the two arresting officers, and $100,000 from the owners of Seasons Pizza. He has tried to file several lawsuits against the police department and the pizzeria in the past. All of these claims have been thrown out by US District Judge Sue L. Robinson, but she has allowed this suit to move forward. 

"It's a joke lawsuit," said Newport police chief Michael Capriglione. "It is sad to see this kind of suit being looked at. The court shouldn't waste the taxpayers' money."

Which of these guys is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll down here:

Who is the bigger cry-baby?

 

Previously: Some people who called 911 on their cat vs. Kanye West

 

Winner: Kanye, unsurprisingly.

Follow Jamie Lee Curtis Taete on Twitter

27 Jul 14:17

​Ask Dr. Nerdlove: She Broke My Heart And Won't Move Out

by Harris O'Malley on Kotaku, shared by Whitson Gordon to Lifehacker
IKEA Monkey

holy shit, the first letter is insane

​Ask Dr. Nerdlove: She Broke My Heart And Won't Move Out

Hello, Internet! Welcome to Ask Dr. NerdLove, the only dating advice column where progress is measured in achievement unlocks.

Read more...


27 Jul 14:13

Britney Spears and David Lynch Are Both Making Bras Now

by Erin Gloria Ryan
IKEA Monkey

Damn, I was hoping David Lynch and Britney Spears were doing this TOGETHER. How great would tha tbe. I'd buy it.

Britney Spears and David Lynch Are Both Making Bras Now

Elusive chanteuse Britney Spears and famed weirdo director/ transcendental meditation enthusiast/ amazing Louie guest star David Lynch are launching their own respective lines of women's wear. Both contain bras.

Read more...








27 Jul 02:52

Mr. Pepper is Finally Allowed on the Bed for the First Time!

IKEA Monkey

you need this

Submitted by: (via Always Hungry Cat)

Tagged: dogs , bed , puppies , cute , Video
26 Jul 15:24

Dana Scully on God and Science

by Chris Higgins
IKEA Monkey

I enjoyed the first video a lot

For your weekend viewing pleasure, here are two supercuts featuring Special Agent Dana Scully from The X-Files. It's fitting that they touch on two of her character's primary interests: the "But Science" defense; and the "OMG" moment. Enjoy!

Science

"What you can't question is the science!" -Dana Scully, every third episode of the series. Scully typically deployed this line because the writers conveniently knocked her character unconscious during a crucial moment showing evidence of vampires, aliens, stretch-monsters, you name it. I've got to admit, this has a nice beat:

God

"Oh my God." -Dana Scully, every fourth episode of the series. Here's a collection of the many ways in which Scully broke a Commandment:

See also: The Scully Box; Chris Carter on The X-Files and 'The '90s: The Last Great Decade'; The X-Files X-Posed; and 7 Things We Should Thank The X-Files For.